I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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