Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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