The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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