Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize