i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
There's always time for handjobs
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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