ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
