Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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