at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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