By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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