like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
