I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
