Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
