I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life