when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
