Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
