Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
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I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
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It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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