she was so not down for the gang bang
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize
