well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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