google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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