I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize