I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Randomize
