I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize