its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
