your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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