That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
