He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
