Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
lol hangovers are for mortals.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize