I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
