Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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