i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.