He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that