omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
