An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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