I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
