I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize