i'm lost and i look like a hooker
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
My life is pants optional.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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