I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
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I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
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We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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