census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow