yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
honey bunches of taint.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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