oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
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We need to start having sex underwater more often.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
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I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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