Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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