chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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