Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
So here I am, sexting at work.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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