I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
stop calling my apartment porn island.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
