I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I'm just crazy horny about you
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
