No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
