I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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