Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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