I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
