you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize