The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Randomize
